Random: I'm really tired of reading about livestock.
OK, Genesis 34. He raped her and THEN fell in love with her? What is wrong with these people?!? And her parents' biggest objection is that the rapist was uncircumcised and it would be disgrace to God to intermarry?? Really? Ugh. SO then the rapists circumcise themselves and all are slaughtered by her brothers while they're still sore. Nice.
This is a very difficult chapter for me. I changed my mind. Let's go back to the livestock. :)
Matthew 11:39. I thought this line was beautiful: "Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace." Very poetic.
Monday, January 31, 2011
January 15 reading
OK, so why did people sacrifice to God (animals) in the Old Testament but there isn't mention of that in the New Testament (I think, I'm only on Day 15 here)?? What's the sacrifice thing all about?
I liked Matthew 10:39. "39 If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself. But if you forget about yourself and look to me, you’ll find both yourself and me." That was deep. I also thought the part about being a razor to cut you from family; that family can be your own worst enemies was pretty interesting.
I liked Matthew 10:39. "39 If your first concern is to look after yourself, you’ll never find yourself. But if you forget about yourself and look to me, you’ll find both yourself and me." That was deep. I also thought the part about being a razor to cut you from family; that family can be your own worst enemies was pretty interesting.
Day 19
Okay so I see now why the Israelites were slaves to the Egyptians...it was Joseph's fault....there's that blame again. It's ironic to me that God's people are slaves to Egyptians and Joseph started it.
I love reading the Psalms in the Message version. I love the verbage!!
Sometimes I don't understand the parables that Jesus told. They don't always make sense. I guess that's how the disciples felt to a certain extent.
That's all I've got.
I love reading the Psalms in the Message version. I love the verbage!!
Sometimes I don't understand the parables that Jesus told. They don't always make sense. I guess that's how the disciples felt to a certain extent.
That's all I've got.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Reflection for the week
If I'm being totally honest with myself, then I have to admit that I've been struggling with a few things this week. Reading some of the Genesis chapters have really bothered me. The whole "my wife is my sister" thing and then just today... the whole story of "Hey, you're going to marry the sister and not your betrothed" followed by "Leah and Rebecca fight over who's going to be a baby mama so they offer up their maids" thing is just ALL JACKED UP.
I have not enjoyed the way that women have been treated in the readings. I find it offensive. I liken it to the way that women are currently treated in the Middle East, I don't think attitudes there have changed overmuch in the last 2,000 years.
I refuse to be treated as less because I have a vagina. I refuse to believe that God is a God that believes that I deserve to be treated as property or be submissive to another because of the way He made me. I utterly refute it. I believe that I, as Woman, was created to be the complement to and helpmate of Man. The scripture was very clear on that. I am not less than my husband, or my father, and I am worthy of the same respect. Period.
I also have to be candid that in my many years volunteering to help raped and abused women have also heavily reinforced these beliefs. I have seen too many women and children, just running to survive, and struggling with the belief that a) they deserve it and b) they should honor their husband above their personal safety. Why do women go back to their abusers? I can't tell you how many of them told me they felt it was their duty as a Christian to return.
I suppose it was because of this heightened sensibility that what happened today at church just struck me badly. Today, our pastor announced three candidates to become senior leaders of our church. Now, I have nothing against these men. These men have worked their rear ends off to serve the church. I have nothing but love and respect for them. I do believe that they embody everything the church stands for. I have no problems with their appointments.
What I do have a giant problem with, and I own this as something that is likely my OWN issue, is that I stood looking at a leadership team of all men.
I love my church for many reasons, one of which is that it is nontraditional. Another is that is unconditionally loving of all people. So my utter disappointment that I was looking at very traditional all-male Christian lineup. It was a complete and total turn-off. I felt angry - and for lack of a finer term on it, betrayed.
I pray for guidance and reconciliation on this.
I have not enjoyed the way that women have been treated in the readings. I find it offensive. I liken it to the way that women are currently treated in the Middle East, I don't think attitudes there have changed overmuch in the last 2,000 years.
I refuse to be treated as less because I have a vagina. I refuse to believe that God is a God that believes that I deserve to be treated as property or be submissive to another because of the way He made me. I utterly refute it. I believe that I, as Woman, was created to be the complement to and helpmate of Man. The scripture was very clear on that. I am not less than my husband, or my father, and I am worthy of the same respect. Period.
I also have to be candid that in my many years volunteering to help raped and abused women have also heavily reinforced these beliefs. I have seen too many women and children, just running to survive, and struggling with the belief that a) they deserve it and b) they should honor their husband above their personal safety. Why do women go back to their abusers? I can't tell you how many of them told me they felt it was their duty as a Christian to return.
I suppose it was because of this heightened sensibility that what happened today at church just struck me badly. Today, our pastor announced three candidates to become senior leaders of our church. Now, I have nothing against these men. These men have worked their rear ends off to serve the church. I have nothing but love and respect for them. I do believe that they embody everything the church stands for. I have no problems with their appointments.
What I do have a giant problem with, and I own this as something that is likely my OWN issue, is that I stood looking at a leadership team of all men.
I love my church for many reasons, one of which is that it is nontraditional. Another is that is unconditionally loving of all people. So my utter disappointment that I was looking at very traditional all-male Christian lineup. It was a complete and total turn-off. I felt angry - and for lack of a finer term on it, betrayed.
I pray for guidance and reconciliation on this.
Day 18 Reading
So I read more about Joseph today. I love that when Joseph finally tells his brothers who he is. He tells them that it wasn't they who sent him away it was God. He said that God sent him to take care of them because of the famine. Joseph has hindsight and faith that God had a plan. Joseph was willing to "take one for the team." Sometimes, I think I have the misconception that things should be easy, come easy, etc. because we've given our hearts and lives to God. That's not it at all, sometimes our discomfort or trials work for the good of others in the long run. It's a small sacrifice. I think of some of my friends and others at Catalyst that are living totally different lives now because of God working through Catalyst and through Levi. I love that! I want to be okay with sacrifice and suffering (not too much-ha).
I also love in the New Testament reading, the blind man. He knew Jesus was close and he yelled for him. He wasn't ashamed or embarrassed. He yelled for his life. And the story of the widow, she kept bugging the corrupt judge. If a corrupted judge can be moved by a widow's pestering, how much better is our God who loves us.
Good stuff today!
I also love in the New Testament reading, the blind man. He knew Jesus was close and he yelled for him. He wasn't ashamed or embarrassed. He yelled for his life. And the story of the widow, she kept bugging the corrupt judge. If a corrupted judge can be moved by a widow's pestering, how much better is our God who loves us.
Good stuff today!
Saturday, January 29, 2011
January 13 reading
It's gotta suck to be engaged for 7 years and then wind up marrying the sister of your betrothed. Crazy people. Good grief.
I did like my Proverbs this day. 3. "11 But don’t, dear friend, resent God’s discipline;
don’t sulk under his loving correction.12 It’s the child he loves that God corrects;
a father’s delight is behind all this."
I did like my Proverbs this day. 3. "11 But don’t, dear friend, resent God’s discipline;
don’t sulk under his loving correction.12 It’s the child he loves that God corrects;
a father’s delight is behind all this."
January 12 reading
Re: Jacob and Esau. I must be missing some historical context. All I could think was: how hard is it to bless both children? Why just pick one? Plus, didn't Esau give up his rights as first born anyway?
Proverbs 3: 9-10. Hey, so here's another question? Why give God physical things? Like the best of your livestock to honor Him? Isn't that the opposite of what's going on in the Psalms to not focus on material things? Is this related to the modern concept of tithing? Where you sacrifice something tangible for God?
-AW
Proverbs 3: 9-10. Hey, so here's another question? Why give God physical things? Like the best of your livestock to honor Him? Isn't that the opposite of what's going on in the Psalms to not focus on material things? Is this related to the modern concept of tithing? Where you sacrifice something tangible for God?
-AW
January 11 reading
OK, so seriously. What is the deal with: "She's not my wife, she's my sister?" First Abraham, now Isaac. Good grief.
Since we're on the topic of fairness, it seems to me the Psalms are all about fairness. That while people may be nasty or rich or deviant here on earth, they will not have a place in God's kingdom. So ignore them, stay on the path, embrace God. I think that's a pretty huge spiritual investment. You have to hold so hard to your faith that those insults and slights are only inconveniences, like a bug landing on your skin. (As opposed to the deep splinters that worry you constantly. That's what it is for me, anyway.)
Other people seemingly getting away with being crappy to others and being monetarily successful just seems to wrong. But today's Psalms were really reinforcing that none of this matters. I'll pray for guidance on this.
_AW
Since we're on the topic of fairness, it seems to me the Psalms are all about fairness. That while people may be nasty or rich or deviant here on earth, they will not have a place in God's kingdom. So ignore them, stay on the path, embrace God. I think that's a pretty huge spiritual investment. You have to hold so hard to your faith that those insults and slights are only inconveniences, like a bug landing on your skin. (As opposed to the deep splinters that worry you constantly. That's what it is for me, anyway.)
Other people seemingly getting away with being crappy to others and being monetarily successful just seems to wrong. But today's Psalms were really reinforcing that none of this matters. I'll pray for guidance on this.
_AW
Friday, January 28, 2011
Day 17
Gen 42 & 43/ Luke 17/ Psalm 5
So, I read about Joseph. And I'm not in denial...I should be on a show called The Fair Factor. Lately in my reading, (and in AW's also...I guess since she called me out...or maybe it's my guilt:) I've read about God working on this very issue. I read about Joseph and how his life sucked. He got thrown into a hole. One of his brothers stuck up for him so that they didn't kill him but then they sold him into slavery. He was a servant and rocked that job and got promoted then lied about by a crazy woman. Went to jail, again rose about circumstances and the unfairness (HUGE) to gain a position as Pharaoh's right hand man. He ends up forgiving his brothers, not even rubbing it in their faces but offering them a huge meal, after he throws them in jail and makes them go get their other brother. They did have a little crap to go through. I haven't gotten to the FORGIVE reveal yet but still.....
Then in Luke it talked about forgiving and forgiving and yep still forgiving.
I don't get it. I don't get how someone can live a life totally different than the one he should have lived. He was the favored son but becomes the captured slaved. His heart is tender to God and his brothers. He is not resentful or pouty or reminding them of their wrongs and the life he has suffered because of their actions. Man, I feel like a jerk. I have a hard time forgiving and letting go and forgetting stupid stuff. I really feel like God is working on me with this. I want to be submissive to that. I saw a tweet from a friend that was the verse Exodus 14:14, The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be silent. That was a great reminder for me in life. I don't have to win. I don't have to be right. I don't have to be fair. Not even in battles, but in everyday life.
And then I read Psalm 5. And these verses stick out.
11 But you’ll welcome us with open arms
So, I read about Joseph. And I'm not in denial...I should be on a show called The Fair Factor. Lately in my reading, (and in AW's also...I guess since she called me out...or maybe it's my guilt:) I've read about God working on this very issue. I read about Joseph and how his life sucked. He got thrown into a hole. One of his brothers stuck up for him so that they didn't kill him but then they sold him into slavery. He was a servant and rocked that job and got promoted then lied about by a crazy woman. Went to jail, again rose about circumstances and the unfairness (HUGE) to gain a position as Pharaoh's right hand man. He ends up forgiving his brothers, not even rubbing it in their faces but offering them a huge meal, after he throws them in jail and makes them go get their other brother. They did have a little crap to go through. I haven't gotten to the FORGIVE reveal yet but still.....
Then in Luke it talked about forgiving and forgiving and yep still forgiving.
I don't get it. I don't get how someone can live a life totally different than the one he should have lived. He was the favored son but becomes the captured slaved. His heart is tender to God and his brothers. He is not resentful or pouty or reminding them of their wrongs and the life he has suffered because of their actions. Man, I feel like a jerk. I have a hard time forgiving and letting go and forgetting stupid stuff. I really feel like God is working on me with this. I want to be submissive to that. I saw a tweet from a friend that was the verse Exodus 14:14, The Lord will fight for you, you need only to be silent. That was a great reminder for me in life. I don't have to win. I don't have to be right. I don't have to be fair. Not even in battles, but in everyday life.
And then I read Psalm 5. And these verses stick out.
11 But you’ll welcome us with open arms
when we run for cover to you.
Let the party last all night!
Stand guard over our celebration.
Let the party last all night!
Stand guard over our celebration.
12 You are famous, God, for welcoming God-seekers,
for decking us out in delight.
for decking us out in delight.
I want to be a God seeker. I want to be running to His cover, not worried about the circumstances of life around me. I don't want to compare or measure up to my friends...I want to just fall into God's arms where His love is relentless and extravagant and unconditional. I blogged on my personal blog a few days ago about some of this same stuff and one of my friends challenged me. Her take on my blog was that I was worried that others won't love me for who I am and then asked if I felt that way about God's love. It kind of took me back. I've never really thought of that. I don't think that I'm insecure or worried that He will not love me. But at times I do feel like I have to do do do because I think I'm supposed to and that's how I make myself okay. Maybe I don't read the Bible or pray as much as I should but dag-gone-it I try to be the "end all" for everyone and will change my schedule to accommodate others to make sure everybody's happy and I'll agree with just about whatever others say so everyone stays happy and that makes me good with God. That's kind of sick and twisted because its goes against the very nature of who God is. He calls us to a life that is different and not the norm.
I don't know...just some thoughts this morning. Not sure if they even make sense.
HL
HL
January 8 reading
I look forward to being caught up... this is a lot of Bible.
Genesis 19. OK, so this is why I've put off reading the Bible for so long. I have issues. Particularly with the way that women are treated in the passages. Here's Lot, he has angels in his house. Here come some horny townspeople and bang on the door, asking for the angels. What does he do? "Want my daughters? They're virgins!" Seriously?? And then his wife turns into a pillar of salt later. And if all that wasn't enough, his daughters get him drunk later, these lovely virgins, to get pregnant by their father.
Really? Jacked. Up.
Random: I like the phrase "steep your life." I like imagining myself as a giant teabag. (Matthew 6:33)
Matthew 7:1-3. This seems especially relevant to me, given something that a friend of mine is struggling with at the moment: "1 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment.2 That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging.3 It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own."
Genesis 19. OK, so this is why I've put off reading the Bible for so long. I have issues. Particularly with the way that women are treated in the passages. Here's Lot, he has angels in his house. Here come some horny townspeople and bang on the door, asking for the angels. What does he do? "Want my daughters? They're virgins!" Seriously?? And then his wife turns into a pillar of salt later. And if all that wasn't enough, his daughters get him drunk later, these lovely virgins, to get pregnant by their father.
Really? Jacked. Up.
Random: I like the phrase "steep your life." I like imagining myself as a giant teabag. (Matthew 6:33)
Matthew 7:1-3. This seems especially relevant to me, given something that a friend of mine is struggling with at the moment: "1 “Don’t pick on people, jump on their failures, criticize their faults—unless, of course, you want the same treatment.2 That critical spirit has a way of boomeranging.3 It’s easy to see a smudge on your neighbor’s face and be oblivious to the ugly sneer on your own."
Thursday, January 27, 2011
January 7 reading
OK, I'm sorry, but Abram is just a dog. First giving his wife to Pharaoh and passing her off as his sister, and now God tells him to sleep with his wife's maid? Seriously? And there isn't divorce? Abram's poor hot wife! This is a total episode of Jerry Springer! Ugh.
Oh good grief. Genesis 17. We're all descended from Abram? Well that explains a lot. On a side note, I think the rainbow is a better covenant with God than a circumcision. Of course, that's my non-penis-having opinion.
Oh good grief. Genesis 17. We're all descended from Abram? Well that explains a lot. On a side note, I think the rainbow is a better covenant with God than a circumcision. Of course, that's my non-penis-having opinion.
January 6 reading
I suppose Matthew 5:32 is where all the hubbub about divorces not being granted comes from. I imagine there's context around this based on what was going on historically at the time, but it sure doesn't make sense to me today. I'm specifically thinking about what I know of Catholics.
And I also suppose that Matthew 5:39 is one of the core tenets of the Amish.
Psalm 6: 1-10 is kinda whiny, isn't it?
Make insight your priority.
-AW
And I also suppose that Matthew 5:39 is one of the core tenets of the Amish.
Psalm 6: 1-10 is kinda whiny, isn't it?
Make insight your priority.
-AW
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
January 5 reading
Well, I just thought this whole day's reading was weird. Very disjointed. I especially thought Abram's whole story was weird. It seemed to me from reading out that he basically pimped out his hot wife to Pharaoh so that they wouldn't kill him. He prospered and got rich because Pharaoh was sleeping with Abram's wife. Then all of a sudden God curses Pharaoh and they give Abram his wife back? WTF? Weird.
Sermon on the mount was cool, though.
-AW
Sermon on the mount was cool, though.
-AW
January 4 reading
Random thoughts:
1) A rainbow = reminder from God of the covenant that He won't flood us out again? Who knew?? Not me!
2) Matthew 4:19. "Jesus said to them, “Come with me. I’ll make a new kind of fisherman out of you. I’ll show you how to catch men and women instead of perch and bass." I really liked this verse. I'm always up for being made a new kind of fisherman. Seriously.
3) Psalms 4:4. "Keep your mouth shut and let your heart do the talking." Another total "holla!" moment. We spend too much time talking to impress others and not enough time listening and loving others. I'm all about this verse.
-AW
1) A rainbow = reminder from God of the covenant that He won't flood us out again? Who knew?? Not me!
2) Matthew 4:19. "Jesus said to them, “Come with me. I’ll make a new kind of fisherman out of you. I’ll show you how to catch men and women instead of perch and bass." I really liked this verse. I'm always up for being made a new kind of fisherman. Seriously.
3) Psalms 4:4. "Keep your mouth shut and let your heart do the talking." Another total "holla!" moment. We spend too much time talking to impress others and not enough time listening and loving others. I'm all about this verse.
-AW
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
January 3 reading
Here's what stood out to me:
1) Matthew 3:10. "What counts is your life. Is it green and blossoming?" It's almost like this has been tattooed on my soul since birth. I have always felt an intense pressure to make the most of my life and make sure it counts. I love the thought of this baptism, the concept of having your old life washed away to be transformed from the inside out. To me, I internalize this as a life walking with God where God is speaking so loud that you can't hear those insidious self-doubts that are always chattering inside of you. That is my hope and my aspiration.
2) Totally digging Psalms. I think it's because it's like poetry. This is my first time reading them. (I have previously given up on reading the bible right after Noah and the flood.) I just love the language, the cadence, and the phrasing.
-AW
1) Matthew 3:10. "What counts is your life. Is it green and blossoming?" It's almost like this has been tattooed on my soul since birth. I have always felt an intense pressure to make the most of my life and make sure it counts. I love the thought of this baptism, the concept of having your old life washed away to be transformed from the inside out. To me, I internalize this as a life walking with God where God is speaking so loud that you can't hear those insidious self-doubts that are always chattering inside of you. That is my hope and my aspiration.
2) Totally digging Psalms. I think it's because it's like poetry. This is my first time reading them. (I have previously given up on reading the bible right after Noah and the flood.) I just love the language, the cadence, and the phrasing.
-AW
January 2 reading
There were two passages in the reading for this day that struck me...
1) The part in Genesis where Adam and Eve are punished for eating from the tree of knowledge. I really struggle with this. I struggle with the notion of God being unforgiving forever and ever. When I say this, I'm specifically talking about forever will Women hurt with childbirth as a punishment and Men will always struggle to make a living until they die. That just seems so harsh. It's very different from what we learn about Jesus, His son, with love and understanding for all. Plus I never saw childbirth as a curse or punishment, even when I almost died.
2) I loved the Proverbs 1:7-9 reading. In particular, this one: "Fear of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline." I guess it's my analyst background. I often deal with fools that are afraid of wisdom and discipline. I read this and I was like, "HOLLA!"
OK, those were my thoughts. One more day of readings and then that's it for me today. I'm going to try and read three days' worth of readings until I'm caught up.
-AW
1) The part in Genesis where Adam and Eve are punished for eating from the tree of knowledge. I really struggle with this. I struggle with the notion of God being unforgiving forever and ever. When I say this, I'm specifically talking about forever will Women hurt with childbirth as a punishment and Men will always struggle to make a living until they die. That just seems so harsh. It's very different from what we learn about Jesus, His son, with love and understanding for all. Plus I never saw childbirth as a curse or punishment, even when I almost died.
2) I loved the Proverbs 1:7-9 reading. In particular, this one: "Fear of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline." I guess it's my analyst background. I often deal with fools that are afraid of wisdom and discipline. I read this and I was like, "HOLLA!"
OK, those were my thoughts. One more day of readings and then that's it for me today. I'm going to try and read three days' worth of readings until I'm caught up.
-AW
January 1 reading
Huh. So evidently with this "Bible in a Year" plan, you're supposed to have been reading a little bit every day. I appear to be 25 days behind! I'll try to do a few days of reading at a time until I'm caught up. I will title each post with the date of the assigned reading so we can all comment on the same readings.
This morning I read "Day 1" which had a variety of scripture from Genesis, Matthew, Psalms. (There may have been more, I didn't take notes.)
I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing with this blog - so here are my thoughts:
1) I really like "The Message" version of the Bible. I like the way it's written, it flows nicely and it's easy to read.
2) One thing that surprised me was that the wise men that visited baby Jesus were spies sent from Harod, and that they fell in love with Jesus and decided not to report back to Herod. No idea on that thing.
3) I really, really, really liked Psalm 1:1-6. I was pretty amused by the Message translation wording. I felt like this one spoke to me (although I'm pretty sure I may fall into the "attended Smart-Mouth college" bucket - I try not to be proud or snotty, though).
-AW
This morning I read "Day 1" which had a variety of scripture from Genesis, Matthew, Psalms. (There may have been more, I didn't take notes.)
I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing with this blog - so here are my thoughts:
1) I really like "The Message" version of the Bible. I like the way it's written, it flows nicely and it's easy to read.
2) One thing that surprised me was that the wise men that visited baby Jesus were spies sent from Harod, and that they fell in love with Jesus and decided not to report back to Herod. No idea on that thing.
3) I really, really, really liked Psalm 1:1-6. I was pretty amused by the Message translation wording. I felt like this one spoke to me (although I'm pretty sure I may fall into the "attended Smart-Mouth college" bucket - I try not to be proud or snotty, though).
-AW
Monday, January 24, 2011
Bible in a year
So here we go, ladies. We can blog to our heart's content about our bible reading. HL says we need to do it three times a week. Let's use our initials, pretty please.
Here's the link again if you lost it: http://www.youversion.com/reading-plans/life-journal-reading-plan
If we want to make this private so just us ladies can see it, let me know.
Here's the link again if you lost it: http://www.youversion.com/reading-plans/life-journal-reading-plan
If we want to make this private so just us ladies can see it, let me know.
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